I didn’t get to post at my normal time because we had a bit of a scare. Last night I started having a new pain from my surgery, and it was pretty bad. It was right at the place where my remaining drain is, and it made me pretty worried. When Husband and I decided… Continue reading Here I am
Yesterday, I was awful. I was cranky and sad and rude. Why? I made the mistake of trying to go shopping in stores I don’t even normally shop in trying to find tops and bralettes to flatter, disguise, or accentuate my new body. Granted, this body is temporary and there could be an argument for… Continue reading Laughter in grieving
Husband and I decided to make me get out of the house and took Daughter to see the new Beauty and the Beast movie. I say that we took her to see it because I do not want to admit that I was sort of desperate to see the movie myself. It did not go… Continue reading My princess moments
When I was pregnant, I remember saying that the nine months made so much sense to me. Every few weeks I would experience a new wave of realization. The fact that I was making a person was becoming more and more real to me as the months progressed and every time I thought I really… Continue reading My preparation
Today is my day. In a less-than-rare moment of freaking out I voiced my biggest and most irrational worry again to Husband. I said to him, “Promise you’ll still love me. Promise you won’t leave.” He smiled and said to me, “Don’t you remember how hard I fought to get you? A little thing like… Continue reading My love
Today my job is to gather the items needed for my after care basket. I will have a bag or basket that I can keep next to me with many items I might need at the ready. I’ll have chapstick, crackers, dry shampoo, tissues, straws, that sort of thing. I also will be picking up… Continue reading My anchor
As a young woman in college, I was taught a lot of lessons by musical artist Ani Defranco, as many were in my time. Among the most important lessons was that “buildings and bridges are made to bend in the wind/to withstand the world that’s what it takes.” The fact of it was one that I had… Continue reading Buildings and bridges
Husband, Daughter, and I went out for a nice dinner last night. It was a way to celebrate spring break and probably our last opportunity to go out as a family for quite a while. The food was wonderful and the conversation was easily some of the best we’ve ever had as a family. On… Continue reading Best ever
I’m a dirty, rotten, no-good liar. I’m neither proud of it nor do I expect to change it any time soon. It’s how I’m getting through every day. People with depression and anxiety get used to telling lies. They often say that things don’t bother them or that they’re not depressed or even upset. They… Continue reading Pants on fire
When I was that age when everything is annoying, I remember my poor mom had to take me on a short road trip twice a year. It wasn’t fun for either of us and, although I don’t remember it specifically happening, I was probably a complete jerk about it. You know, because kids are the… Continue reading Non-traditional tradition
Elephants in the Room 