Husband and I decided to make me get out of the house and took Daughter to see the new Beauty and the Beast movie. I say that we took her to see it because I do not want to admit that I was sort of desperate to see the movie myself. It did not go how I expected. Let me explain.
As you know, I’m 41 years old and I’m fat. I was fortunate in my youth and got what I wanted out of my time, so I’ve been to my homecoming dances. I went to my proms. I’ve had a fabulous wedding to my own Prince Charming. I’ve worn pretty dresses (and ugly dresses) and danced my slow dances. I’ve had my princess moments. Nevertheless, there I was in the movie theater crying my eyes out because I will never be a princess again.
How ridiculous is that? I was so upset because I will never be able to look like a princess. Again: 41 and fat. My princess days were probably pretty much over anyway. Regardless, I could not shake my sadness at not being princess material anymore.
Of course, I pulled myself together and left the movie normally. I hugged Daughter goodnight as Husband sang to her and sent her to bed. Then I cried some more as Husband held me. All of this came after having a long day in which I am certain I did too much and never really had time to rest. I had been feeling so ok, too. I had been out and about all day with one breast, and it didn’t seem to get to me. Until it all did.
Maybe I won’t ever be a princess again. I guess I’ll need to find something new.