When you have something like cancer, people ask you how you are doing in the days leading up to or following surgery or a treatment. They check in to make sure you’re doing ok when they know something big is happening. It’s wonderful to receive support from people in this way. I never knew how many… Continue reading My truth today
When I’m feeling overwhelmed or stuck by what I have no control over, I get very focused on a future project. Sometimes it is simply rearranging furniture. When I’m extremely lucky it’s about a vacation, but right now it’s about my body and what I can actually control. There’s not much that we can control… Continue reading When you just know
I’m feeling less than happy today. I had an appointment with my surgeon and, while I was hoping to receive the “go ahead” for my next surgery in two weeks I had a lot of fluid drained instead. I get to go back in two weeks yet again and see if we can schedule then.… Continue reading Balancing act
It’s that time in my life again- time to get my resume into the hands of principals and try to make myself look appealing on paper. I think I do ok. I mean, the two times I’ve submitted it I’ve gotten called based on what I wrote. Still, I will admit to some frustration when… Continue reading My moment
I’ve been quite the complainer lately. In fact, I was chatting with a lovely friend of mine who suffers from chronic illness and I realized that I was complaining about my pain to someone who experiences it daily. Sure, she was great to talk to because she had such amazing empathy, and when I became aware… Continue reading Finding unexpected comfort
When you’re first diagnosed with breast cancer and you share the news with your family and friends, people tell you some pretty specific things. They tell you that you’ll beat this thing. You are a warrior. You’re strong. You’ve got this. Then, when there aren’t any more cancer cells in your body, they congratulate you… Continue reading The middle of the war
Yesterday I had a really bad day. I went to get a temporary prosthesis to wear in two specific instances before my second mastectomy surgery: if I want to wear one of my two favorite dresses and job interviews. I planned to get one, for now, to “balance myself” and then get a matching,… Continue reading To be flat or not to be flat
As has been happening with a relatively alarming frequency lately, things with Daughter are quite a challenge. She is going through quite a lot, I know, and it is expected that she would have some adverse reactions. Being nine when your mom goes through breast cancer has to be hard, and her frustration is… Continue reading My heart
When my family lived in Colorado, I would often go long periods without being able to see my brothers, sisters, and mother. While I tried to make it happen every year, and though I did see my mother that often, there were sometimes periods of two years in which I didn’t see siblings. In one… Continue reading Presence makes the heart grow fonder
A few people have admitted to me that there are things they want to know about my experience that they’ve been hesitant to ask. Through conversation and comments, a common thread I have found is that people are curious about the pain and sensations that I may experience now that my breast is gone. I… Continue reading My pain
Elephants in the Room 